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㽶ƵֱSingle non-white jacket㽶Ƶֱ: RCMP write personal ad to find lost coat㽶Ƶֱs owner

A jacket with 㽶Ƶֱsomething valuable㽶Ƶֱ in pocket was found behind North Vancouver Salvation Army
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Single Non-White Jacket Seeks Lost Partner. (North Vancouver RCMP)

North Vancouver police are asking the public to help make a 㽶Ƶֱromantic reunion.㽶Ƶֱ

Police issued a tongue-in-cheek news release Wednesday that looked like a personal ad for a 㽶Ƶֱsingle non-white jacket.㽶Ƶֱ

㽶ƵֱYou dropped me off on that rainy night, behind the Salvation Army Thrift Store on Fell Street in North Vancouver,㽶Ƶֱ the release said. 㽶ƵֱBut I think you still miss me. Because you left something valuable behind, in one of my pockets. Not a scarf or pair of socks, but something much more valuable. Maybe you just wanted one last chance to hold me?㽶Ƶֱ

The jacket is described as 㽶Ƶֱbroad shouldered and nicely tanned,㽶Ƶֱ with an astrological sign of Virgo, and that it㽶Ƶֱs seeking a Scorpio who wears a size XL.

㽶ƵֱBy my guess, you㽶Ƶֱre over 40 (but you don㽶Ƶֱt look a day over 29!). You know how to treat a jacket. You never labelled me and I loved you for that. You㽶Ƶֱre clean, but not a neat-freak.㽶Ƶֱ

The news release writer even goes so far as to describe the jacket㽶Ƶֱs interests.

㽶ƵֱI love long walks on the beach and candle-lit dinners. I㽶Ƶֱm not sporty, but I㽶Ƶֱm just as comfortable at a pub as I am at the symphony.

㽶ƵֱI㽶Ƶֱm warm, soft, formal, and low-maintenance. I don㽶Ƶֱt like labels, so nobody can tell where I㽶Ƶֱm from. I㽶Ƶֱm well put together, and have never fallen apart in public. Smooth-chested. No back hair!㽶Ƶֱ

The release does not say when the jacket was discovered, but if you㽶Ƶֱre the owner, your jacket is 㽶Ƶֱmissing you㽶Ƶֱ and you㽶Ƶֱre asked to contact North Vancouver police at 604-985-1311.



joti.grewal@bpdigital.ca

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