I've never been especially concerned with who the members of my family, or my friends, chose to vote for.

Didn't change how I felt about them, or affect our relationship, even an iota.

When I was 18 and able to vote for the first time, I proudly asked my Mum if I could put a sign for my favoured candidate (don't even recall who it was all these years later). It caused a minor kerfuffle when Dad initially balked, given it wasn't the preferred candidate (the one he was voting for). 

In the spirit of compromise, we talked about his reasons for supporting his candidate, and I mine. While we didn't agree (I do recall his reasoning being far more well thought-out than mine), it ended with us having the only yard with signs in duelling corners of the front yard.

We laughed about that many times over the years. 

I have a variety of friends whose political views or personal beliefs differ (mostly just a little, but in some cases more) from mine. Doesn't matter a whit. It was like if a friend was a fan of a different sports team, you might find it a tad unbecoming, but they were still your buddy in the end. 

If I know someone, a sign in their front yard declaring a personal preference doesn't change how I feel about them as a person.

I've voted for various parties and an array of candidates over the years, at all levels. I have friends who have run for office, friends who have held office. I've been asked about potentially running by folks on opposite sides of the political spectrum - and am pleased with that because I've never shared how I vote at any given time. Mostly because it shouldn't be of paramount concern but also because my job has always dictated I display impartiality and I take that seriously.

Now, I've long since understood that politics can be an unsavoury at times and it can stir up plenty of emotion. But I've never seen things as absurd as they've been in the last decade or so - and it continues to get worse.

I have to say I still (naively or otherwise) believe most people are inherently decent, happy to focus on themselves and allow others to do likewise. They understand that life is about nuance and dealing with absolutes is fraught with peril. Someone whose views aren't exactly the same as your own isn't automatically the enemy.

But as social media becomes more pervasive, it gets harder and harder to escape the noise. And online, it can get wild. There's little middle ground. So much polarization, so much tribalism. If someone is not on the 'correct' team, everything they say is wrong. And if someone is on the 'correct' team, everything they say is golden. 'Owning' the other side becomes the only goal. Reasoned discourse becomes less and less a possibility, as folks seek only information or other opinions that confirm their own. And there's legitimate loathing, hatred and vitriol on display daily. Often stoked by rage farmers online, with the sole goal of sowing discord.

It has to be difficult to get truly effective leadership (from any party) given the 'anyone who disagrees is the enemy' nonsense. And the horse is out of the barn now. I'll be fascinated to see if anyone can ever get it back inside.

Philip Wolf is the editor of the Parksville Qualicum Beach News and Vancouver Island Free Daily.